Too Far
by Trivette Lover Heather
Summary: It was only a matter of time, we finally went too far" - Hawkeye Pierce.... Please review it helps me, help you.
1. Default Chapter

Too Far

By: Trivette Lover Heather

--

One held the door opened while the other two softly lifted the Majors cot and moved it outside the tent into the bunker; the Major had recently had the enlisted men, dig up. As they set it down in the bunker, they filled it with leftovers from the mess tent. The three then scurried away, snickering and stumbling over themselves.

The next morning they were awaken by mortars.

"Trap...we're getting shelled." Hawkeye hollered, waking up his bunkmate.

"PIERCE!!" was heard from the middle of the compound, and he suddenly remembered their late night caper.

"Frank." The two said in unison, as they ran to the door, they saw the shells were coming closer and closer to the camp.

"We gotta go see Henry." Trapper replied starting out the door.

They watched as Frank slipped out of the bunker and attempted to run into post op; suddenly he slipped and during his attempt to get up, a shell exploded only feet away from him.

Glancing quickly at each other they raced towards him.

Hawkeye turned him over and checked his wounds. "He's hurt bad, get a stretcher."

"How bad?" Trapper appeared with the stretcher.

"See for yourself." Hawkeye quipped, screaming over the continued shelling.

Trapper couldn't believe his eyes. "Holy"

Everyone had begun to gather in post op, with Radar on the phone with headquarters and Henry covering his panic as best he could, things were getting more chaotic.

"What happened?" Major Houlihan entered pre op.

Hawkeye and Trapper were scrubbing up. "Frank was hit bad, shell fragments, head wounds"

"What was he doing? How? What?"

"Margaret calm down!!" Trapper hollered as the shelling still continued outside.

"Calm Down? Captain, I... I will do no such thing."

"Well can you do no such thing, somewhere else?" Hawkeye replied, grabbing a towel.

"Major look, we need help in there, you up for it?" Trapper asked, also grabbing a towel.

Two nurses put on their gowns and gloves, while the Major started to compose herself.

"I am." She straightened up and lifted her head high.

"Then hurry up will ya." Hawkeye said backing his way into the operative ward, Trapper following close behind.

"Trap, I'll start in the chest, nurse start cleaning up that thigh."

The shells seemed to be hitting closer and closer to home. "Don't they know we do surgery between 2 and 4 every day?" Hawkeye quipped. "Suction."

"Suction."

"God what a mess." Trapper commented.

"Damn."

"What is it?" Trapper looked over. "Clamp it."

"His BP is dropping Hawkeye."

"The hell it is...he's not ruining my streak....clamp."

"Clamp."

"Got a fragment near the aorta."

This caused Trapper to look up suddenly. "Easy." 

"Start another unit Major." The Major didn't move. "Margaret, get him another unit!" Hawkeye repeated. Still to no avail.

"Murphy, get him another unit....Margaret, if you can't handle this, you either leave or I'm gonna remove you myself!" Hawkeye was practically screaming as he kept working.

"Can you get at it?" Trapper asked. "Give him some suction nurse."

"Pulse is dropping, you gotta get out fast."

"I can't see it dam nit! I can't see it." He hollered. "Suction...clamp"

For a second Hawkeye looked at Franks face, and the blood that covered his forehead. It was their fault he was out there, it was their fault he fell, he couldn't let him die.

"Don't even think about it Frank!" he said, while clamping another artery. "I think I see it...got it...Alright let's close him up, quick"

The nurse came in with the other unit, Margaret momentarily relieved.

Hawkeye and Trapper worked quickly to close him, his BP and pulse still wavering.

"Get him into post op, same orders."

Hawkeye and Trapper stayed in the operating room alone for a moment while they took him out.

"Jesus, that was..." Trapper began.

"Horrible." Hawkeye finished. "We're not finished ya know? I bet you any money; there were more fragments we missed. The shell hit so close it was a miracle he was alive for us to operate on."

Suddenly a shell exploded, causing the Captains to drop to the floor.

"Tell me about it." Trapper hollered as they got up and headed to Henrys office.

---

"Where have you two been? We're getting our butts shelled off!" Henry yelled, coming up from under his desk.

"Frank was hit bad with a shell; we thought we'd try to save his life." Hawkeye lifted his hands, and they fell to his sides.

"Very funny"

"Really Henry, he was hit, he's in pretty bad shape...we're probably gonna have to go back in."

"You're serious?"

"Yes." Trapper nodded.

"Sir...regimental on the line"

"Hold it a second... so Franks hurt bad huh? How bad?"

Hawkeye wiped his hand over his face. "Bad."

Henry saw the look in their eyes and understood. "Do what you do, and I'll do whatever Radar tells me to do, and we should be okay."

"Right Henry." Trapper replied and the two surgeons headed to post op.

--

"How is he Major?" Hawkeye appeared next to her.

"Not good Captain, his BP and pulse are still dangerously low; he's started to run a fever"

The major was obviously anxious and restless. "Margaret, we can't"

"I know Captain; you can't go back in, till he's stable"

"Right." Trapper nodded. "We just gotta hope that he stays with us till then."

"There isn't much else" Hawkeye began.

"You can do...yes, I know."

Hawkeye sighed and put his hand on her shoulder. "Just watch him Major; let us know if anything changes."

The two wandered back into Henry's office and waited. The shelling finally stopped and the camp was attempting to repair the damage.

"Any change with Burns?" Henry asked, pouring them a drink.

"Nothing. But if he doesn't get stable soon, we're in trouble." Trapper replied taking the glass from Henry.

"It's our fault he was out there." Hawkeye said staring aimlessly in front of him.

"Hawk, don't start again with that garbage, we couldn't have known the shell was gonna hit there...get off it." Trapper scolded.

"_Right_ Trap, like you don't feel the least bit responsible."

"Wait a minute,_ how_ was it your fault?" Henry asked sitting down.

Trapper went on to tell him the prank they had pulled on Frank the night before. This time no snickering followed.

"He's right Pierce." Henry started.

"It was just a matter of time, we finally went too far." Hawkeye replied, gulping down his drink.

Radar then burst into the office.

"Sirs! Major Houlihan needs you right away, its Major Burns."

---

END CH 1

AN: Radar is my favorite cliff hanger helper. Let's just hope I don't get writers block with this one, like I did my last one. Please review, it helps me, help you.

Take care – TLH †


	2. That Look

Too Far

CH.2

By: TLH --  
  
The three surgeons ran after the young corporal and arrived at Frank's bedside.  
  
Hawkeye stopped dead in his tracks as he saw the look on Franks face like he'd seen on so many others faces.  
  
Hawkeye swung next to Margaret and began to bang on his chest. "Trapper get on the other side, start ventilating him."  
  
Henry stood by in shock. The rest in the corridor doing the same.  
  
Trapper grabbed Hawkeye's arms to stop them. "He's gone Hawk, there's no way to bring him back now."  
  
"What are you talking about? Its only been a minute! Not even."  
  
"There's more damages than that. We can't open him up again. He's…"  
  
Hawkeye stepped back from the bed and almost fell as he reached the bed behind him. "This isn't…he can't…holy…"  
  
Margaret now stood, her face buried in Henry's chest. "Radar…"  
  
"I'll take care of it sir."  
  
Post op was silent. The occasion whimper from Margaret was the only thing that broke the silence.  
  
Hawkeye couldn't say a word. Trapper made his way around the bed, and slipped his arm around Hawkeye's back. "Let's go to the SWAMP."  
  
Hawkeye nodded, his eyes still fixated on Franks face. Trapper noticing, took the sheet and covered his face. "It's over Hawk. Let's go…come on." He could barely move his friend, but after a moment, he finally began to walk towards the door.  
  
Margaret still noticeably crying, finally lifted her head to watch them leave. "It's your fault you know that!!? It's all your fault!!"  
  
Hawkeye and Trapper both looked back quickly, Hawkeye wanting to say something in their defense but couldn't.  
  
"Why couldn't you just leave him alone!!? Now look what you've done! You…murderers!" Finally, Henry managed to pull her away and towards his office. But the damage had already been done.  
  
Trapper and Hawkeye stood and watched as Henry yanked her away, and with another glance at Frank's body, they headed for the SWAMP.

-END CH 2

Please review, it helps me, help you.


	3. Needing Eachother

Too Far CH. 3  
  
"Sirs Mail Call." Radar entered the SWAMP. Days after the "incident."  
  
Hawkeye hadn't spoken to anyone in days. Only the occasional nod in passing. He had drunk himself into a stupor two nights in a row and Trapper could do nothing but watch. He knew he had to let him grieve in his own way for what had happened.  
  
Henry was still stunned by the whole thing, and Radar has just buried himself in his work like he always did to hide showing how he felt.  
  
"Trapper." He handed a couple envelopes to Trapper.  
  
"Thanks Radar."  
  
"Hawkeye" Radar tried not to shout.  
  
Hawkeye seemed to be passed out so Radar set the letters on the edge of his cot.  
  
"Major Burns."  
  
Only Radar hadn't said it.  
  
Hawkeye lifted his head up slightly. "Don't forget about Major Burns Radar, I'm sure he got something."  
  
Being the first words he'd spoken in days, the two friends stood silent.  
  
Hawkeye sat up, grabbing his head. "Well?"  
  
Radar swallowed hard. "Well what sir?"  
  
"Ferret face…where's his mail?"  
  
"It's being stopped at HQ and being sent back to the States sir." Radar looked up at Trapper confused.  
  
"Hawk, you know he's not gonna get mail here anymore…what's the matter with ya?" Trapper added.  
  
Hawkeye was rubbing his temples and attempted to stand up. He glanced around the tent, particularly at Major Burns's cot which was empty, and belongings gone.  
  
He looked over at his two friends, sighed, and left the tent.  
  
"What was that about?" Radar asked.  
  
"I'll keep an eye on him; you just get back to getting us that replacement kid."  
  
"Yes sir."  
  
The two followed Hawkeye's exit. Trapper following as Hawk made his way to the Mess Tent.  
  
Everyone was happy to see Hawkeye out of his tent and walking around. They all tried to say 'Hello' and 'How are you?' but Hawkeye just passed them by.  
  
Trapper caught up to him as he was getting coffee.  
  
"How ya feeling Hawk?" He got no reply.  
  
Trapper started to get a bit frustrated and stopped Hawkeye in his tracks.  
  
"Listen Hawk, this is getting out of hand, it's been days already, and if you don't start talking I'm fixing to have Radar call Sidney!"  
  
Hawkeye simply shrugged and stepped around his friend, glancing around the room. He took a seat.  
  
"Well hello there Hawkeye, good to see you're out and about my son."  
  
He took a sip of his coffee. "Father…can we talk?"  
  
"Why of course, is my tent alright?"  
  
"That's fine."  
  
The two stood up and Trapper watched as Hawkeye followed the Father out. He suddenly felt a hint of jealousy, but let it pass as he realized his friend was making a step forward.  
  
The two took a seat.  
  
"What's the trouble my son?"  
  
Hawkeye bowed his head. "Father, I can't do this anymore."  
  
"What exactly can't you do?"  
  
"I don't want to be here anymore, I hate this place."  
  
The father nodded and tried to console. "That's no sin Hawkeye."  
  
"No, but murder is."  
  
The priest's eyes widened. "Murder? Hawk…"  
  
"I killed Frank, Father."  
  
Father Mulcahy understood.  
  
"It was his time Hawkeye."  
  
"Why do you priests always say things like that? I mean if I hadn't been such a jerk, it wouldn't have been his time. So how can I justify what I did with that statement Father?"  
  
"Hawkeye, I don't have all the answers to why. But I do know that you would never hurt Major Burns knowing full well what would have happened. Give yourself a break, Hawkeye. There was no way you could have known; no way could you have prevented that shell from falling. Please my son, take refuge in those thoughts. They are all that will save you from tormenting yourself any longer."  
  
"That's exactly it Father. I feel tormented inside, like my insides are all torn up. I can't look anyone in the eye. I can't interact with them like I used to…"  
  
"Why?"  
  
Hawkeye thought for a second. "I guess I'm feeling sorry for myself Father."  
  
"Ya see, my son, this camp needs you. And whether you like it or not, you are depended upon. Now you take your time and grieve in your own way, but you and I both know the War will come back anytime, and those soldiers will need you. Just like we all need you Hawkeye."  
  
For the first time in days, and slight smile fell across his face. "And I need all of you."  
  
The Father nodded. "So why don't you go tell all of them, just that."  
  
"Thanks Father…I knew…I just knew you could help me."  
  
"That _**is**_ what I'm here for…" he chuckled a bit.  
  
Getting up to leave, Hawkeye grabbed the Fathers hand and squeezed it. Causing the Father to be deeply touched. "And I don't know what we'd do without you Father."  
  
--  
  
Hawkeye passed by Radar on the way to the SWAMP and stopped him. "Hey Radar."  
  
"Hello sir." He stopped surprised.  
  
"Listen, I want to apologize for my little episode earlier, I was a little out of it."  
  
"It's alright sir…are you better now?"  
  
Hawkeye took a deep breath. "I think so Radar, I think so."  
  
He patted Radar on the shoulder and headed towards the SWAMP.  
  
"Hey Trap."  
  
Trapper looked up. "He speaks."  
  
"I want to apologize."  
  
"For acting irrational, crazy and scaring the crap out of me."  
  
"Among other things…I was just messed up, pretty bad, and I know you were there for me and…I'm sorry I couldn't come to you."  
  
"I'll always be here."  
  
"I know…"  
  
"Hey Frank dying, hurt me too. I mean I helped remember? I know we all deal with it differently, and I guess this was your way."  
  
"I guess." Hawkeye replied. "Thanks for understanding."  
  
"I'll never understand you Hawk, but that's good, cuz you'll always keep me guessing."  
  
After he left the SWAMP he knew there was one more person he needed to see.  
  
Margaret had been working like a mad woman and hadn't spent any time alone except for when she slept, which was hardly at all. She missed Frank's closeness and it hurt that their friendship was cut so short.  
  
"Major, can we talk?" Hawkeye approached her from behind. Avoiding her ability to walk away.  
  
"I see you're finally sober Captain, congratulations."  
  
"Margaret, we need to talk."  
  
"I have nothing to say to murderers."  
  
He shook his head. "Damnit Major, I didn't kill him! The North Koreans did, and the sooner you realize that, the sooner you'll stop being mad at me and start being mad at yourself."  
  
"How dare you?"  
  
"It's not your fault either Margaret."  
  
"I never said it was."  
  
"You pushed him away that night, mad at him for something irrelevant and you kicked him out." Hawkeye tried to say softly.  
  
"How'd you know? I….who do you think you are?"  
  
"A nobody, stuck in the middle of war, where people I care about get killed. And am only trying to help."  
  
"Well don't! I didn't ask for your help! Now get out!" She screamed and pointed towards the doors.  
  
And Hawkeye knew right at that moment, their relationship would never be the same again.  
  
THE END!  
  
AN: Let me know what you thought. I'm taking a risk, ending it like this! Please review, it helps me, help you. 


End file.
